Ahead of Valentine’s Day, Kaspersky, a cybersecurity firm, has urged couples to recognise red flags in digital relationships, as new research reveals nearly half of respondents (47%) fear their partners may violate their online privacy.
The global study, seen by Technology Times, highlights how digital tools like location tracking, password demands, and stealth monitoring apps can escalate into harmful behaviour.
Kaspersky’s report, surveying individuals worldwide, found 23% encountered online stalking from recent partners, while 10% reported unauthorised location tracking and 7% discovered stalkerware—secret surveillance software—on their devices. Such tools, including GPS apps or Apple AirTags, enable covert monitoring, often framed as protective measures.
“In modern relationships, the line between care and control in digital spaces can be subtle,” Kaspersky says. “Stalking, particularly online stalking, is often misunderstood as an expression of intense interest or concern. However, this misconception overlooks the fact that digital behaviours — like monitoring messages, tracking locations, or accessing accounts — can become controlling and even harmful.”
How digital gaslighting can erode trust
“In modern relationships, the line between care and control in digital spaces can be subtle,” Kaspersky says. “Stalking, particularly online stalking, is often misunderstood as an expression of intense interest or concern. However, this misconception overlooks the fact that digital behaviours — like monitoring messages, tracking locations, or accessing accounts — can become controlling and even harmful.”
In relationships, the decision to share digital information should be voluntary. Some couples share passwords for practical reasons like accessing streaming services or managing schedules.
However, Kaspersky warns that “a controlling partner may weaponise passwords as a means of control, using manipulation and coercion to gain access (‘If you have nothing to hide, why not give me your password?’) or even log into your accounts without permission.”
The research also draws attention to location sharing. While consensual sharing of a location can be a safety measure, it becomes problematic when it turns obsessive. According to the study, 10% of respondents said their location was tracked without consent, and 7% experienced surreptitious installation of stalkerware—software that monitors activity without the user’s knowledge. This software is used to monitor a partner’s movements via tools like AirTags or GPS apps.
The study further outlines how digital gaslighting can erode trust. It notes that 39% of respondents experienced violence or abuse from a current or previous partner, including tactics such as deleting messages or editing screenshots to distort reality. In such cases, a partner may claim, “I never said that. Check our chat — you’re imagining things,” leaving the victim questioning their own memory and judgment.
Kaspersky has actively combated such threats since 2019, co-founding the Coalition Against Stalkerware, now 40+ members strong, including NGOs and law enforcement. In 2024, it launched an Anti-stalking Awareness Guide with survivor input, the cybersecurity company said.
The company has recently enhanced its Android security suite with the “Who’s Spying on Me” feature that detects stalkerware and identifies suspicious Bluetooth devices that might be used for offline tracking.
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